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SAVING OUR RELATIONSHIP: PART 3

I come to you crying because I've made a huge mistake. The stud I left you for dumped me so I got a real taste of my own medicine. As it turns out, the grass was greener on the other side only because I didn't water my own. I should never have left you and now realizing I have feelings for you still, I know I need to stop this toilet slavery... It's not like you want to be with me anymore, right? Wait, you do?? Does this mean we can go back to being a normal couple? This is wonderful! Though...I wouldn't mind one last hurrah, y'know? I'm going to go stuff myself full of fast food, fiber, and laxatives and I'll be back to use you one final time, my love. Are you ready for my love dump? Open wide for your beloved girlfriend.

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