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Wear dirty white socks in slip on shoes or sneakers. Also need pen or pencil with book or notepad or crossword. Have feet propped out in front of you doing crossword. "Uuhhh." Slide shoe partially off and reach pencil in shoe to itch toes. "Break time. But all i get to do is itch my foot." Keep itching with pencil then slip shoe back on. Few seconds ""Itchy itchy itchy!" Stomp foot couple of time then reach hand in shoe to itch bottom then pencil for toes. "Left my foot spray at home." Take off that shoe and continue crossword. Wiggle toes then itch on other foot, stomp foot, use pencil. Itch those itchy toes! While itching talk about athletes foot. Symptoms, sock smell, sweaty feet. "Guess my other foot is jealous. Slid partially off to itch with pencil. "Fuck it." Take off other shoe. "People can just smell my feet. Fuck it. So what i got smelly feet. They can just deal with it." Itch feet on each other and with pencil. "If they had athletes foot, they would understand my misery right now. Wow this room smells like ___. Keep itching toes. Throw crossword to side. "Pencil just don't work. Scratch feet furiously. Look up startled. "You been here the whole time?? *teasingly* Did you enjoy the show?" Wiggle toes